Writer's Block

So what the hell should I write, I honestly don't know, I feel that I have to truly get started writing that story that is at the back of my mind, but I don't know where to start, and I have been procrastinating, because I don't have a computer, and I will be buying one soon, in a month or so I should have one already, a nice notebook by apple, yay, but that doesn't mean I can't start writing now............... I just don't know where to start, and what story to start putting down, I know it will be in English, just because it will be easier to get publish something here in Denver if it isn't in Spanish, ( though, you never know ).
I have a rather dark character in mind for a story, and I am a little concerned that I will have to go to a bad place in my mind, to get the proper fuel for the story, but then again, it is not an autobiography, so, maybe I don't have to, hhhhmmm complicated this life is.
What I do know, is that I need to write something good enough to get published, something that will actually become a book, and as such, it will sell, but I don't even know what way to go. How do I pull this out of my ass? That is the question.
I also have an idea about a pimp, a made up autobiography, or should I say, the biography of a made up character, it is a very peculiar pimp by the way, I got the idea from an ex co-worker, and it is brilliant, thanx "K".
So if you have any suggestions, let me know, ( that includes you Megan ), and hopefully I will have something down soon, later.

Just so you know.

Windows SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Back in Denver

It is strange to go back "home" when I actually went home for a vacation, I visited the city where I ended my adolescence and entered adulthood, I visited the town I grew up in, and everything was so familiar and yet so different.
Fortunately I was able to see old friends, people I had not seen in ages, people I went to school with, for what seems like forever, forever ago, and I see things getting prettier, getting dirtier, getting bigger, just like us, just like the people the towns and cities are made of, I now am truly aware of the fact that I am a wanderer, that I am neither from here or from there, I guess I am from everywhere. And though it is true that, I have set up base here in Denver, I know it is temporary, I know that as soon as I get a good opportunity, I will leave, Europe calls, Miami awaits, South America is a must, and home, well, home is where the heart is, so I will make the world my home, I am a citizen of the world, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Cab

Apparently Denver has one of the worst systems available for dispatching taxis, I waited for a cab for an insane amount of time, so long actually, that I forgot what I had in my mind for this post, FUCK, anyway, a big middle finger to the lame ass system Denver has for its cabs.

Okay, This just made me laugh

It's silly, that is why I like it, so I share it with you guys.

Homecomming

Going home is always exciting and strange, I grew up in a turistic town, and the growth it's had in the last few years is astonishing, the kids are married, the grown ups are now officially old, people are dead, and the tourism is booming, so the international supply for the international demand, has kept up, so of course the amount of specialty everything ( clothing, food, classes ) has increased impressively, but the quantity of girls with great asses doesn't seem to have changed.
I thought globalization would have included that by now, oh well.

You have it all, now have more.

Seriously, there have always been the rich parents that pay for everything that Junior could possibly need, I think that the transition of something to monetary nothing is very valuable in creating a better and stronger character, look at W. Bush, that is a man that has never had a single day of hard labor in his life, and he is ( sadly yet humorously ) running a country, I guess daddy really has a lot of money if he could afford junior the presidency.

Dental Traveling

So to fix some cavities that I have, I would have to pay well over 1200 bucks, and that wasn't even the reason I went to the dentist, I need my wisdom teeth pulled out, and that would pretty much cost me my first unborn child, but ha!, that jokes on them, I'm not even getting laid, hehe, but, the better option is to go back home, and have it all taken care of over there, So I have a plane ticket to Guadalajara, and I am ready to get my teeth exorcised, to bad I won't be able to enjoy the good ol Mexican food as much as I would like to, but, It has to be done, so I will travel for dental care, I wonder if they will give me Morphine, probably not, but I will need SOME KIND of medication, Tequila won't do it for this kind of stuff.

And the night...

Is exquisite company to the existence.
One exists so much more, with you.

Well.....

....I need to write about something, I really don't want all those huge gaps in my blog, but my brain is kinda numb right now, though, I am aware that I need to write an opinion about the world of cinema and the effect and influence it has on peoples lives, this from the Denver perspective, ( it a rather international effort my friend Hernan has come up with, an international blog for the global masses ). Sounds great, but what the hell do I write about? Without a doubt, here in the US, people seems to have a bigger void to fill, and what Jennifer Aniston is wearing, or whatever amount of punchlines "Wedding Crashers" has, seem to fill....Well, no not really, they don't fill the emptiness, but do get quite cozy in there, and seem to be entertaining enough to avoid dealing with the void. This of course is a generalization, but DAMN it is common, it seems that real substance is lost on the masses, and people who are ignorant really need to live the illusion that they are connected to the lives of celebrities, even the pseudo ones, it is very sad indeed, and as common as a tabloid newspaper.

Skin

I managed to get away...
But I can't take off my skin
to shed the horror, the dread,
seems I'm still sweating fear.

The games the mind can play
-games it seems I'll never win-
bringing back the panic... The dead
and it is always crystal clear.

Though I survived... In a way
living tastes just like sin
couldn't heal... So I fled
but I'm stuck in the same gear.

( This is something I wrote for a character in a movie, sadly the project never took off, but t he experience was good. )

I went, but I had to come back

Sometimes we find something that helps to define us, sometimes we will find something that we had no idea was missing, but fits perfectly in to our life just like a piece of a jigsaw puzzle fits flawlessly in the landscape picture cut up into 2000 bits. I am a Capoerista, this is part of what I am now. And just like the beard I am now regrowing, and the color blue I substituted in my early adolescence for the color green, I am now bringing it back full on, Sometimes a change won't do you good, sometimes looking outside of the box just makes you realize that you already have the answer boxed up and ready to go.

24

So...I am aware of my age now more than ever, I can't help being this young, it's not my choice, and I can't speed up the process of becoming old, even though I feel like I am considerably underaged for my persona, I should be 32, or 35, something like that would make more sense, and I don't understand how my age has always been a disadvantage as far as dating, the last woman I had something to do with freaked out when she found out I am twenty four, she thought I was in my thirties, and that in itself was young enough, she is forty, as I said: She freaked out.
I have heard countless times how youth is the best time of one's life, be it childhood, adolescence, or the early twenties, somebody is always saying how those years were amazing, and I don't get it, I do enjoy certain things of being a young adult on my own, but from that to actually think these years rock well, that is a very big leap, and to be honest, I hated puberty, so if it is down hill from here, then I will welcome whatever thrill there is to come, last Friday night I almost got in a car accident twice, in a time frame of less than five minutes, curiously enough I wasn't afraid for myself, not at all, but I was worried for the guy that was driving, anyway, no harm was done.
So now what do I do, I guess the best thing to do is grow up regardless of my age, not that I am an immature person, but I can become 28 or 30 regardless of what my state ID says, first step, regrowing my beard, and this time it will not come off for a very, very long time. I should probably buy a car as well, definitely a computer, but the debate is whether or not should I say my real age. What do you think?

Beat this Caption

"I don't care if your balls are stuck to the ice, I am NOT going to rub them untill they warm up!"

Untitled

Fear of death....Anglisism,
the celebration of the parting,
and invoking the darkness to
surround one's life, one's breath,
one's soul, one's pain, one's death.
For what?... For living,
for breathing, healing, re-living.
If your whole life passes
before your eyes in an instant,
then you live a whole life
within a second,
you live twice before
you fade to black.
Die... So you can live,
live.... Before you die.
Purge..... That's what
passing away means,
be drained of toxicity, of
the toxic pain or your being,
and absorb, resuscitate
so the burdens alleviate,
give in to the cycle
so you can be free within it,
exhale to inhale.

How does this make you feel?

It's important that you know this,
it's important that you see
I'm a mess a dumb-fuck idiot,
but hey, it's still me.

May Day Quotes

"Whenever there is a major community movement, especially a major community movement in which local people are participating, there is never any one place that has control over it," said Cecilia Munoz"

“The arguments against [the immigrant community] claim we abuse the economy of this country… And if this is in fact the case, then that day we will see a resurgence of the economy,”

So, are you guys ready...?

This monday there will be a boycott on behalf of the inmigreant population, so there will be several million people on board to send a message: WE ARE HERE, WE ARE NOT GOING ANYWHERE, AND WE WANT EQUALITY. If this movement reaches the proportions it can potentially reach, then we will be facing something historical of gargantous proportions, and the united States goverment is defenitely gonna have to listen, I am very anxious to see exactly what is going to happen, and the differrent reactions people will have.
Of course the Latin comunity is the leading force behind this, and with so many hispanics all over this country, we are to big of a force to ignore, a lot of people don't know that the nightly news transmitted from Univision has a larger audience that the news shows froms ABC, CBS and NBC combined! And that is every night monday thru friday, no fluke there.
Fortunately it isn't only the Latin community involved, but the asian community, as well as the Muslim, the Black, and the Jewish community are getting on board, and though it is true that the respons from these groups is not unanimous and of 100%, it is still a very large section from their populations, enough to make the message a whole lot louder.
But for now ( friday ), there is no way of knowing what the figures will be, we will just have to wait and see, and we will see...

Redeeming One's self.

Redemption is a bitch, I was always a wonderful person, an example in many ways, but at some point I cracked, I tried to keep it together but failure isn't always a choice, so I crumbled, now I'm on The Long Hard Road out of Hell, vindication is so elusive, but to get back to where I was is not impossible, I have the blue print of what I am to rebuild: Myself, and looking back into my past the instructions are clear, the turning points I remember, there is no better guide to what I want to be, than what I once was...Still...It's the hardest thing I have ever faced, Redemption is a Bitch.